Sunday, April 14, 2024

What To Say To Someone Having Surgery For Cancer

General Get Well Message After Surgery

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  • “Throughout history, ‘tender loving care’ has uniformly been recognized as a valuable element in healing.” -Larry Dossey
  • Medical treatment is about three caregivers: the patient, the surgeon, and the inner surgeon. Hope each gets the attention they deserve!
  • Hope you feel all the love surrounding you right now.
  • Thinking about you today and hoping it’s a good one for you.
  • Get better and get back to your amazing self soon!
  • Sending you a warm hug, love, and prayers.
  • Sending good, healthy vibes your way.

Do I Need Genetic Counseling And Testing

Your doctor may recommend that you see a genetic counselor. Thats someone who talks to you about any history of cancer in your family to find out if you have a higher risk for getting breast cancer. For example, people of Ashkenazi Jewish heritage have a higher risk of inherited genetic changes that may cause breast cancers, including triple-negative breast cancer. The counselor may recommend that you get a genetic test.

If you have a higher risk of getting breast cancer, your doctor may talk about ways to manage your risk. You may also have a higher risk of getting other cancers such as ovarian cancer, and your family may have a higher risk. Thats something you would talk with the genetic counselor about.

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Messages To All Cancer Patients

Mount Miriam Cancer Hospital put up a World Cancer Day message board for survivors, caregivers, supporters & staff to share their messages to cancer patients around the world. These are the 33 heart-warming messages:

1. You are stronger than you think.

2. Cancer can take away all of my physical abilities. It cannot touch my mind. It cannot touch my heart. And it cannot touch my soul. JM

3. Never give up. Give yourself a chance to see the world again. Fight till the end.

4. We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.

5. Hei Fighter, we know it hurts and it is tiring, but stay strong. It might be stormy now, but it cant rain forever. Theres always rainbow after the rain. And the joy after the pain. Be strong and of a good courage. Luis, Survivor

6. Never give up hope easily. Give yourself a chance simply by fighting till the end.

7. Support the fighters. Admire the survivors. Honor the taken. Never give up.

8. To all cancer patients, nothing is impossible. With prayers, love and courage you will win the battle over cancer. Never give up, you will never walk alone. Shawn

9. You cant cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water. You are not alone. Together, lets fight through the waves. #WorldCancerDay2018

10. Dear all fighters! You are doing an awesome job! Keep it up! You can do it. Hats off to you. Phyllis

11. World Cancer Day Together, its possible.

15. Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles.

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Using Humor Can Be An Important Way Of Coping

Humour can provide hope, support and encouragement. It can help relieve stress and let the person take a break from the more serious nature of the situation. But you don’t want to joke unless you know the person with cancer can handle it and appreciate the humor. You might want to steer away from jokes or stories about cancer unless you know the person well enough to gauge their response. Let the person with cancer take the lead its healthy if they find something funny about a side effect, like hair loss or increased appetite, and you could certainly join them in a good laugh, but it’s best to let them initiate this.

Being A Support Person

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You may want to offer to be the support person. This involves providing practical and emotional help to the person with cancer before, during and after surgery.

Before surgery, you can accompany the person to appointments and help them make an informed decision about their treatment. Once they decide to have surgery, you can help them follow any instructions they are given, organise their personal items and paperwork, and provide transport to and from the hospital.

On the day of the surgery, you can stay in the surgical waiting room during the operation. The surgical team may ask that there is only one support person, as there may be limited space in the waiting room.

The nursing staff can give you an idea of how long the wait will be. You may want to go outside for a walk and some fresh air, or to meet a friend or family member for support. The staff can take your contact details and call you when the surgery is finished.

For information about carers services, see Caring for someone with cancer, or contact Carers Australia on 1800 242 636.

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Here Are Six Tip To Help You Start Talking

  • If you are not sure what to say or even whether they want to talk about it, let them take the lead. If they want to speak they will and you should be a good listener. Some people want to speak about everything, some people dont want to talk about it at all.
  • There is no right or wrong way for a cancer patient to behave.
  • Its ok to ask if they want to talk about it, you just need to respect their answer. In fact, it may be best to ask, unless they start the conversation first and then let them take the conversation where they choose.
  • Silence is sometimes better than noise. It helps people think and they may have a lot going on in their minds. If there is silence it’s Ok to wait until something is said, if you have nothing to say.
  • Talking about cancer or treatments or side effects or indeed about anything too much, just because you think you should, can be annoying. It can suggest that you are not paying attention to the person’s needs and is not helpful.
  • Smiling, and warm looks can get past the barriers of the illness to the person you know and love. If you dont know them that well, silence, listening, and showing understanding may be the best way to show support. Warm touches for comfort may or may not be welcome and you need to think if you would do this to the person anyway if they were upset about something else.
  • Let your friend know its okay if he or she doesnt reply or want to talk.

    Is Stage 4 Cancer Always Terminal

    When most people hear someone close to them has stage 4 cancer, they can begin to fear. But it is important to know that Stage 4 cancer is not necessarily terminal, a person will not always die from stage 4 cancer.

    Rather than that, it means that the person is dealing with the most aggressive form of cancer. And because of that, they will have to submit themselves to the most aggressive forms of treatment.

    Having stage 4 cancer can also mean that it may have metastasized, which means it may have spread to other areas of the body.

    Terminal cancer is usually called the one in which there is no possibility of remission, and the person will live with cancer for the rest of their lives, however long that may be. But other people will call terminal cancer the end stage of cancer.

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    Visiting Someone In Hospital

    Seeing your loved one after surgery can be frightening and overwhelming. They may have drains, drips, tubes or monitors attached to them, and the anaesthetic may make them groggy, sick and confused. Most people soon return to their usual self.

    Each hospital has different visiting policies. As a general guide:

    Nine Encouraging Words For Cancer Patients Who Just Received The Cancer Diagnosis

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    Can you imagine what was going through your friends/relatives head when the doctor diagnosed him/her with cancer? It is definitely a heavy burden to bear. Here are some encouraging words for cancer patients who have just been diagnosed with cancer:

    I just heard the news from your wife, and I just wanted to let you know that I am here for you. You are one of my closest friends, and I pledge to stand by your side. I will be there through all of the ups and downs that come with treatment. I will help you in every way possible to fight this disease. You will beat this, and you will rise like a phoenix from the ashes, stronger than ever before!This is without doubt a challenging time for you and your family, so Ive contacted you to let you know that you are in my prayers. Whatever you need, I am only a phone call away. In time, this will be a success story that we can tell our kids. Well be able to tell them that you kicked cancers ass!Im sending good vibes and healing energy your way! I know this is a very difficult time, so just know that you are never alone. All of your friends and family are rooting for you to make a speedy recovery.Youre probably wondering to yourself why this is happening to you. The truth is that God will never give you more than you can handle. He knows you are a warrior, and so do I! I will support you during every leg of the journey until you rediscover your strength!

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    Determining The Costs Of The Procedure

    Before you have surgery, discuss the costs with someone from the finance department at your healthcare provider’s office. These costs may include the following:

    • The surgeon’s fee for surgery

    • Hospital fees or ambulatory surgical center fees . Check with the hospital’s business office regarding these rates. Your healthcare provider or surgeon should be able to give you an approximate idea of how long you will be in the hospital.

    • You will also be billed separately for the professional services of others who might be involved in your care, such as the assisting surgeon, anesthesiologist, and other medical consultants.

    Check with your health plan before surgery to be certain of what portion of the costs you will be responsible for. If your anticipated costs present a problem, discuss other financial solutions with your healthcare provider before the surgery.

    Let Your Friend Know Its Okay If They Don’t Want To Talk

    Someone with cancer might not always want to think about or discuss their health or treatment. It may just be the wrong time or it may be always. Sometimes talking about their cancer or treatment makes them identify a cancer patient and this can strip away their self-identity. If they don’t want to say anything about their illness or treatments, talking about other things or having a joke are often welcome distractions and another way to show support.

    When someone is diagnosed with cancer they can go through a whole range of emotions. At times uncertainty or fears of treatment and the unknown can make cancer patients feel angry, depressed, or anxious. Fears of their future health and hope for their future may be at the top of their mind. This is a normal part of the cancer journey. It may be at these times that the person needs their friends and family members close for support. Some may need extra help from a support group to learn to deal with the changes cancer has brought into their life. These groups can sometimes also provide hope. Whether they will want to speak to you, or anyone, about their cancer or treatment, will vary from person to person. What is important is that you try to hear and understand how they are feeling, don’t make many suggestions and try to understand how their life has changed and their health may never be quite the same.

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    What To Say To Someone With Breast Cancer

    Talking about serious illness can be difficult for most of us, and it can be hard to find the words when a loved one, friend, neighbor, or coworker tells us about their breast cancer diagnosis. While there are recommended things you can say , its important to know that there is no single right way to talk to someone coping with breast cancer. You might make mistakes or missteps, and thats normal. Something that seems like a mistake can also be an opportunity to open up a new kind of conversation with this person in your life.

    While there are recommended things you can say , its important to know that there is no single right way to talk to someone coping with breast cancer. You might make mistakes or missteps, and thats normal. Something that seems like a mistake can also be an opportunity to open up a new kind of conversation with this person in your life.

    To help navigate conversations about breast cancer, LBBC spoke with Kelly Grosklags, LICSW, BCD, FAAGC, a grief counselor and oncology psychotherapist, for communication tips based on her years of listening to people living with cancer.

    Being A Good Listener

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    A good listener tries to be aware of someones thoughts and feelings as much as they can. You dont need to have all the answers. Just listening to a persons concerns or worries can be hugely helpful.

    A good listener tries to really tune in and listen to a person in the moment. Listening is an important part of providing emotional support.

    Here are some tips on how to listen well.

    • Try to keep the setting private, relaxed and with few distractions.
    • Maintain eye contact but dont stare.
    • Let the person with cancer lead the conversation and try not to interrupt.
    • Give your full attention to what they are saying.
    • If youre finding it difficult or upsetting dont change the subject say how you feel, this can prevent any awkwardness.
    • If they cry, dont try to cheer them up. Reassure them that its OK to be sad and that its a normal response to whats happening to them.
    • A friendly touch of the hand can help but if they pull away give them space.
    • Try not to give advice unless they have asked for it.
    • Dont use humour unless they have used it themselves.
    • Silences are OK, dont feel like you have to fill them with words.

    This video has top tips from people affected by cancer on how to listen to someone with cancer. It is 54 seconds long.

    How to listen to someone with cancer – Top tips from patients

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    Comforting Words Before Surgery

    Which pre-surgery well wishes for an operation should you send a loved one? Any person scheduled for a medical operation requires comforting words. Here are simple but thoughtful messages you can send to offer solace.

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    • I know today is a big day for you, but I’ll be here for you on the other side.
    • Sending you a warm hug, love, and prayers.
    • I’ll see you in a bit! I love you.
    • Sending good, healthy recovery vibes your way.
    • I’ll add you to my prayers, asking that your surgery will be successful.
    • The good Lord will see you through.
    • This procedure will be long done before you know it.
    • Hold on a little longer, before you know it, you’ll be back on your feet.
    • You have to survive this! You must live and tell your crazy story.
    • You’re in great hands. You will get through this.
    • Things will be better after your surgery.
    • I’ll be praying for you and your medical team.
    • I’m sending you all the positive energy during this trying time.
    • For every minute you’re in there with the doctors, I’ll be with you in spirit.
    • I’ll be there when you wake up in the recovery room.

    How Do You Know What To Say To Someone Who Has Cancer

    We want to start by saying that there is no right or wrong way to speak to a person with cancer and it is OK if you don’t know what to say. This is your colleague / friend / loved one / family member who is ill, they may be scared or worried or they may be taking their diagnosis in their stride. The most important thing at this stage is to listen. However, carefully choosing what you say can also help you show your support.

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    How To Handle Hospital Visits

    Hospital visits are not mandatory cancer diagnosis “etiquette,” if there is such a thing. Many people have a deep aversion to hospitals, and if you identify with this, know that there are many other ways you can show how much you care.

    If you dont have a problem with hospitals, there are a few things you should consider before making a visit:

    Remember, its not about you. During your visit, make sure your conversation is focused on the patient, and not about your issues.

    Eight Encouraging Words For Cancer Patients Who Have Experienced A Cancer Relapse

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    Hearing from the doctor that the cancer has relapsed must be the most heartbreaking thing to hear in the world. Now, more than ever, your friends and family members will need your support to keep them focused on their goals. Here are eight encouraging words for cancer patients who have experienced a cancer relapse:

    It must be exhausting to have to go through this process again, but I am here to support you in every way possible. Please, you dont need to hesitate to reach out to me, even though I will be checking on you regularly. I know this must be very frustrating and disappointing for you, especially because I witnessed how much you went through. I feel deeply sorry for you. If you ever need someone to talk to, you always have my ear.Unfortunately, these things happen. When they do, we have to reassess the situation and keep pushing. We will never give up, as long as you have breath and strength.Hearing something like this, after all of the treatments you went through, is hard to deal with, and I imagine that it is very scary for you. Fret not, Im praying for your health and strength every single day because I know things will get better.Thank you for allowing me to be by your side on this journey. This set back will not deter me from being there for you, my friend. Im with you all of the way!

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